Sometimes after a hard day, I like to relax and enjoy a cocktail or ten...uh i mean two. Today has been one of those hard days. Don't you dare judge me for drinking in the middle of the week! I'm sure it's Friday night somewhere. Besides, it's purely medicinal. My boobs hurt! Well actually, the area where my boobs used to be hurts. I'm 4 weeks out from having breast reduction surgery and even though my back feels GREAT, this here front part is still pretty darn sore. The plastic surgeon removed four and a half pounds FROM EACH SIDE! But I'll be OK.
Verily I say unto you: yeah tho I dwell in the valley of the small-breasted woman I shall fear no cleavage for mine is still with me... at least until all the swelling goes down.
Uh, yeah what was I saying?
Oh right, this is where I go to bitch about things. Well, first of all, when all the neighborhood kids are gathered in my living room eating MY Fritos and playing video games, the word "Dude" is grossly overused. Don't you just hate that? And how is it that  that one little word can mean so many different things? "Dude!" "Dude?"  "Duuuuude."  Did I miss something? I mean was there a class on hipster-speak or what? How am I--being the mild mannered mom that I am-- supposed to know what the hell these kids are talking about?
There's so much else I could bitch about but my favorite wiener dog needs help. ( don't ask)