It is not yet 7:30 AM and already I'm having a bad day. I made my coffee and my son's oatmeal just like every other day. First I dropped the oatmeal, broke the bowl and splattered oat meal and broken glass everywhere. Then my son and his trusty dog Lily came running to see what had happened. Bad timing. They ran right into me causing me to spill hot coffee all over myself. OUCH! Good news is I only spilled half the coffee. Sweet! I can still get at least a partial caffeine fix. So I set the coffee on the table while I start cleaning up my mess.
I mopped up most of the spilled coffee with a dish towel, got most of the oatmeal and broken glass swept up, and took the dust pan outside to dump in the trash. Being less than a week before the "fall back " time change, it's still dark outside at this time of the morning. Even with the garage light on I failed to see that the outside trash can is covered with fire ants! And in about two seconds I was too. AAAAAHHHHGGGGGG!!!!!
I throw down the dust pan and start slapping at the ants crawling all over me. I'm slapping my arms, my legs, my feet! To no avail whatsoever! Those little beasts were as tenacious as they are EVIL!!! I was left with no alternative. I grabbed the garden hose and, standing right there in the driveway, I hosed those little demons off me. Again, I try to see the bright side. At least it's not cold yet here in South East GA.
So I drag my soggy ass back into the house, get a quick shower, apply some itch-stopping ointment to...well, pretty much my whole body, and prepared to grab what's left of my coffee, reheat it, and relax for just a few minutes before I have to take the boys to school. The Universe had other plans! My coffee was GONE!
OH CRAP! I forgot Daisy ( the weiner dog) loves coffee. And what's more she's still spry enough to jump right up into a chair and drink from a cup right off the table. I know Daisy loves coffee because every time my hubby leaves his cup sitting around, my darling Daisy wastes no time sticking her furry nose right in it and lapping it up like it's the Nectar of the Dogs. OK, I admit it's kinda funny when its his coffee. And I probably would have been able to laugh it off this time had it not been for one thing:chocolate. My coffee this morning was a delicious chocolate-mocha- latte-type drink. Yes, I said CHOCOLATE ! The stuff that makes dogs SICK !! There was a trail of chocolate-covered-kibble-vomit going all through the house.
All my charming sons could do was comfort poor sick, Daisy. Forget poor ME !! Don't bother offering to help clean up this millionth mess of the day! I'm the MOM! I can handle it!!! I can handle it MYSELF !!!
That was about the time my positive outlook just flew out the window. I believe that if I keep a positive outlook, positive things will happen. But c'mon, seriously !?! How much can one mom take? Is the Universe testing me? Is this Divine Retribution for not taking my shopping cart back into the grocery store? Will I survive this day?
Only time will tell.